Mother backs over 8-year-old

[Lorah]

http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20080902/NEWS/809020399/1034&title=Mother_backs_over_8_year_old


Okay, WTH? She *thought* he was in the backseat???

I don't know what kind of vehicle she was driving, but when I back up I LOOK back to see out the window before the car moves! Wouldn't she have noticed if he was in his seat belted in or not?

I guess maybe I'm just anal about it, but no matter who is in the car I always ask if hey are belted in before the car moves!

Very sad! :(

[tcolera]

Nope your not anal, i do a head count too.

[Lorah]

And wouldn't you think an 8 year old would be talking or making some sort of noise? It just seems odd to me....very sad, but something isn't adding up in my mind.

[tcolera]

Seriously was she driving a school bus so she couldn't see. An 8 year old is big enough to see in your rear view mirror. Maybe she just closes her eyes when she back ups?:dunno

[Sara]

Seriously was she driving a school bus so she couldn't see. An 8 year old is big enough to see in your rear view mirror. Maybe she just closes her eyes when she back ups?:dunno

Or on the phone...

[Kellie_MO5]

he must have either been *right* behind the car, or she was pulling out pretty quickly, because any 8 yer old *I* know wouldn't just stand behind a moving car

[Lorah]

Seriously was she driving a school bus so she couldn't see. An 8 year old is big enough to see in your rear view mirror. Maybe she just closes her eyes when she back ups?:dunno

Wow, I know....how else would you miss seeing your 8 year old not being in the car, or even behind the car for that matter.

Or on the phone...

Ohh ya! The phone! I could see that.

[TaivensMama]

Thank goodness, my car has a beeping censor for things like this....so sad :(

[Sara]

I'm really paranoid about this kind of thing since I drive a SUV and because I actually know of someone who ran over their son and the boy almost died (but he is totally fine now, aside from the mental trauma). I don't know what exactly happened in her situation, but I think the son was supposed to be inside with daddy and ran out to see the mom as she pulled away. I always check 800 times before I pull out just to be sure.

[My3sonsplus1]

'Eh I have enough life experience to know that it can happen to even the most loving families... I can easily see the kid having been in the car and jumped out to get something. My kids don't nessasrily make a bunch of noise in the car. And you have to remember an 8 yo is in a booster or adult belt it isn't like she didn't buckle him up yet thought he was in the car. Kids aren't known for their fine tuned ability to not be spazzes at time. And like Sara said all it takes is him getting out of the car and her finishing up a phone call.

[becky]

this is so sad and the mom is an idiot. Sorry but how do you not know your 8 yr old kid is not in the car. WTF

[Lorah]

Ya, Sara, I know I am the same way! I check and re-check etc!

I think the reason this seems to odd is that he was *suppose* to be IN the car with her. And I don't get why she didn't notice or why if she noticed he wasn't why she decided to back up anyway.

[Colleen&Kail]

so sad.

[becky]

i guess i am super paranoid and even though the kids get in the car i wont do one last double check to make sure everyone is in their seat and buckled in before I will even put the car in reverse. The thought of running over my kid or someone else just freaks me out.

[Marisa]

Just curious but do you all use your mirrors to back up or actually turn around? Dh is always giving me a hard time about my reversing *skill* or lack thereof specifically because I *don't* like to rely on my mirrors and will actually face backward when I'm driving backward.

[My3sonsplus1]

not related to our own kids but kids are nuts and think they are invincable/are just spacey. Have you not ever gotten at least sort of close running over the neighborhood kid because they don't watch driveways for cars backing up? I know Joseph is a space case with his selective hearing. The boys like to run down the street after dad when he leaves for work, it is our tradition. They stay on the rock part of our driveway until he backs up into the street and then they race him, me standing next to them the whole time, and I have had to tell them they can only go 2 houses away because those houses do not have cars in them otherwise they'd just keep going not paying to attention to if a car is backing up even with me reminding them 500 times.

[Kellie_MO5]

Have you not ever gotten at least sort of close running over the neighborhood kid because they don't watch driveways for cars backing up?
Nope ...
if the kids aren't with me or in the house when I go somewhere, then I make sure they're all on the front lawn where I can see them before backing out (and the dog, too)

[My3sonsplus1]

Nope ...
if the kids aren't with me or in the house when I go somewhere, then I make sure they're all on the front lawn where I can see them before backing out (and the dog, too)

:headscratch so you make the kid 4 doors down riding his bike in front of his own house and who isn't playng with your kids come stand on your lawn? I am talking about the ditzy neighborhood kids that are playing on their own and dart in back of cars not your own.

And I'd have to say we nearly ran over one of said neighbors of yours when driving down the street as they ran out in front of the van so maybe I just got the brunt of that little girls lack of brains?

[Kellie_MO5]

so you make the kid 4 doors down riding his bike in front of his own house and who isn't playng with your kids come stand on your lawn?

He's actually never been out whenever I have to go anywhere, but yeah, I have made the other neighborhood kids that are running around get up on the sidewalk where I can see them so I can safely back out.. and I have yet to have a kid tell me no or not do it.

[My3sonsplus1]

He's actually never been out whenever I have to go anywhere, but yeah, I have made the other neighborhood kids that are running around get up on the sidewalk where I can see them so I can safely back out.. and I have yet to have a kid tell me no or not do it.

huh... our neighborhood is pretty quiet to it is a bit of a moot point here but in the past I know we've had issue with kids not paying attention to cars backing up and cars nearly backing into us personally after sitting there for forever and we give up waiting for them and suddenly they now must back up. And my mom's street has sassy kids on it that won't move. I mean I wouldn't say we've actually "almost ran over anyone" but I have seen darters both behind cars in driveways and ones that run out in traffic from between parked cars without slowing down.

[lornabrown]

Oh so sad. Lets give the mom the benefit of the doubt. Honestly I could see how someone could be in a hurry, multitasking, etc and have a horrible accident like this happen. It's a reminder to slow down and be more careful when driving.
Sara - I don't rely on mirrors either. Tim, too always says I just have horrible driving skills....but the other day he almost caused an accident doing a lane change when he didn't turn to look. Mirrors don't show blind spots.

[becky]

Have you not ever gotten at least sort of close running over the neighborhood kid because they don't watch driveways for cars backing up?
nope. we have a ton of kids on our block many of which who like to play in the street next door. I have just learned to pull out slow like a snail when there are kids out and then i stop the car in the driveway as the garage door closes to look down the sidewalks and street for kids. if need be i will honk my horn at the kids who don't notice that i am pulling out.

[Kellie_MO5]

huh... our neighborhood is pretty quiet to it is a bit of a moot point here but in the past I know we've had issue with kids not paying attention to cars backing up and cars nearly backing into us personally after sitting there for forever and we give up waiting for them and suddenly they now must back up. And my mom's street has sassy kids on it that won't move. I mean I wouldn't say we've actually "almost ran over anyone" but I have seen darters both behind cars in driveways and ones that run out in traffic from between parked cars without slowing down.

Well, everyone has diff experiences... I was just answering your question
Have you not ever gotten at least sort of close running over the neighborhood kid because they don't watch driveways for cars backing up?
with mine

[tcolera]

I have never come close to running over any kid. If you know there are kids I would hope you would be EXTREMELY cautious, using mirrors and turning around. Those who have come close, I am so happy you don't live anywhere near me, maybe you should consider your driving ability.

[My3sonsplus1]

I guess my real question should have been have you never seen kids not paying attention to cars :thumbup. We can only control our own driving abilities not unattended kiddos impulses and some situations make it harder/easier to see said nutso kids :).

[tcolera]

Then as a parent is is your job to teach you kids safety and if necessary to be there to watch your kids to make sure they are safe. All the excuses are crap, if you child doesn't know to look for cars coming out of driveways at an older age of if you kid is to young to understand and you are not there watching them then you are failing as a parent.

[becky]

Then as a parent is is your job to teach you kids safety and if necessary to be there to watch your kids to make sure they are safe. All the excuses are crap, if you child doesn't know to look for cars coming out of driveways at an older age of if you kid is to young to understand and you are not there watching them then you are failing as a parent.i agree. last summer there was a toddler down the street who was always running out into the street and no one was around or they were to far away to stop him. It always made me nervous so i never drove down that end of the street. These are the same parents who didn't have that same son in a car seat until I called the CHP on them.

[Kellie_MO5]

*and* as a driver it is also your responsibility to be aware of your surroundings and know that there's a kid running down the sidewalk that *might* dash out into the street, or a ball lying in a gutter that a young child may run out to get, and drive accordingly (as in extra carefully)... so yeah, being a parent you have to school your kids on safe play while outside, and being a driver you have to be aware and show safe driving by example... and fwiw it always makes be nervous seeing young kids running down the sidewalk without an adult *right* next to them (as in running with them and keeping up) because that kid could make a split decision to cross right in front of you, and you'd have no time to stop

[becky]

fwiw it always makes be nervous seeing young kids running down the sidewalk without an adult *right* next to them (as in running with them and keeping up) because that kid could make a split decision to cross right in front of you, and you'd have no time to stopi know what you mean. Shelsea has just discovered the driveway curb and that it goes right out to the street. even standing right next to her she is fast enough to dart into the street so most times we have to tag team Shelsea to keep her out of the street.

[Lorah]

Just curious but do you all use your mirrors to back up or actually turn around? Dh is always giving me a hard time about my reversing *skill* or lack thereof specifically because I *don't* like to rely on my mirrors and will actually face backward when I'm driving backward.
I'm a cautious driver. I use all possible techniques. No offense to your hubby, but using all possible methods for backing up seems more to me like *skill* rather than just using only part of the resources and then guessing on the rest. There is no way to see everywhere with just the mirrors kwim?

That being said I look in all my mirrors many many times, and over my shoulder both directions....I don't want to hit anything or anyone! and I always back up slowly!

Have you not ever gotten at least sort of close running over the neighborhood kid because they don't watch driveways for cars backing up?

NEVER! And I have lived in many places with LOTS of kids, and animals, etc. Basically when I'm walking out to the car I look around to see what kids are there and animals, etc. I ALWAYS tell the kids I'm leaving. And even then I don't get on the phone, and I don't turn on the radio...I have never come close to hitting anything, let alone a child. Even the kids in my parents neighborhood on a small cul-de-sac (however that's spelled) with 7 house and 19 kids many of whom wouldn't pay attention, everyone was always aware of who was where, and when...we did head counts of the neighbors kids even to be absolutely sure they were all safe and okay.

It's my opinion that it's the drivers responsibility.

if the kids aren't with me or in the house when I go somewhere, then I make sure they're all on the front lawn where I can see them before backing out (and the dog, too)
:yeah about the dog too :lol

I have made the other neighborhood kids that are running around get up on the sidewalk where I can see them so I can safely back out.. and I have yet to have a kid tell me no or not do it.
:yeah

*and* as a driver it is also your responsibility to be aware of your surroundings and know that there's a kid running down the sidewalk that *might* dash out into the street, or a ball lying in a gutter that a young child may run out to get, and drive accordingly (as in extra carefully)... so yeah, being a parent you have to school your kids on safe play while outside, and being a driver you have to be aware and show safe driving by example... and fwiw it always makes be nervous seeing young kids running down the sidewalk without an adult *right* next to them (as in running with them and keeping up) because that kid could make a split decision to cross right in front of you, and you'd have no time to stop
:yeah

[My3sonsplus1]

I have never come close to running over any kid. If you know there are kids I would hope you would be EXTREMELY cautious, using mirrors and turning around. Those who have come close, I am so happy you don't live anywhere near me, maybe you should consider your driving ability.

*and* as a driver it is also your responsibility to be aware of your surroundings and know that there's a kid running down the sidewalk that *might* dash out into the street, or a ball lying in a gutter that a young child may run out to get, and drive accordingly (as in extra carefully)...

and fwiw it always makes be nervous seeing young kids running down the sidewalk without an adult *right* next to them (as in running with them and keeping up) because that kid could make a split decision to cross right in front of you, and you'd have no time to stop

of course one should be aware of their surroundings and obvious signs of kids; toys, actual kids etc.and drive slwoly but this still is not accounting for the kids who play peekaboo with cars running out from in front of parked cars and the split decision darter you are refering to Kellie. Seriously that kid you don't like Jessie playing with jumped out in front of the van and waved joyfully at us while we were driving down that busy cross street next to your house when we were doing a drive by to look at the house across the street a few months back. We didn't "almost hit her", not in the least, but *had* we been going faster or blinked at the wrong moment who knows. She's lucky it was us and not some hit rod jetting down the street. In a possibly unrelated rant pedestrians are getting crazy and think because they may legally have the "right of way" that they no longer need to watch out for cars and can just run out in front of them. Unfortunatley the law of motion trumps city/state/federal law so even if you are running across the street in a sidewalk doesn't mean you don't need to look for cars first. And is it so far out of ones ability to imagine a child might come out of their house, thinking specifically neighbor kid but obviously parents do run over their own kids as well via bye bye syndrome, while you are in your car so you don't see them? The last place we lived out had these awful tall hedges running from driveway to sidewalk and we had a kid who paid no attention.We always told him we were leaving when we saw him but there were still a few times he'd still continue to ride his bike past as we were backing up! Short of and included standing there as dh backed up there was little we could do as who knows where he came from...

Then as a parent is is your job to teach you kids safety and if necessary to be there to watch your kids to make sure they are safe. All the excuses are crap, if you child doesn't know to look for cars coming out of driveways at an older age of if you kid is to young to understand and you are not there watching them then you are failing as a parent.

I dunno if you were speaking theoretically or to me actually but I do not feel that I am failing my children just because they haven't fully gotten it to watch for cars in all instances esp when excited. I am there near them because I know this fact but I don't think the sheer fact they can be wandering "butterfly chasers" reflects on my parenting abilities.


But alas I don't even drive so perhaps I am not qualified to even participate in the convo as a backseat driver having not BTDT personally ;)... it just seems I hear of lots of "good" people having run ins/near misses with darters... be that kids, cats, dogs, squirells whatever.

[Colleen&Kail]

never came close, i agree that it is your responisibly to teach *your*but you cant rely on other children to watch for cars. its like saying your a good driver and you expect everyone else to be, but they arent.

[Marisa]

I'm a cautious driver. I use all possible techniques. No offense to your hubby, but using all possible methods for backing up seems more to me like *skill* rather than just using only part of the resources and then guessing on the rest. There is no way to see everywhere with just the mirrors kwim?

That being said I look in all my mirrors many many times, and over my shoulder both directions....I don't want to hit anything or anyone! and I always back up slowly!


:lol He doesn't look *only* in his mirrors but what I was trying to describe is me actually contorting my body to face backward *while* I'm backing up. I feel more in control that way and he laughs at me.

[MamaLaura]

I guess my real question should have been have you never seen kids not paying attention to cars :thumbup. We can only control our own driving abilities not unattended kiddos impulses and some situations make it harder/easier to see said nutso kids :).

:thankyou

[Lorah]

:lol He doesn't look *only* in his mirrors but what I was trying to describe is me actually contorting my body to face backward *while* I'm backing up. I feel more in control that way and he laughs at me.

ohhh gotcha...sorry.


Ya, I have been known to do that too. Makes sense....I mean, we face forward when driving forward, why not face backward when driving that way? :thumb

[MamaLaura]

I've come close to hitting kids before. Not my own because they're too young, but neighborhood kids, walking and on bikes.

I'm getting frustrated that everyone wants to jump on this lady like she did it on purpose. It's her own child. Come on! It was an accident. Accidents happen. None of us were there and we don't know the specifics of the situation, so I really think it's unfair to get mad at her for it. We all know possible things she could have done, and we don't know if she did them and this still happened, or if she didn't and what the reason for that is. It happened. It's sad. But I'm sure she didn't do it on purpose.

God forbid this ever happens to one of us, I hope nobody talks about it the same way.

[My3sonsplus1]

I've come close to hitting kids before. Not my own because they're too young, but neighborhood kids, walking and on bikes.

I'm getting frustrated that everyone wants to jump on this lady like she did it on purpose. It's her own child. Come on! It was an accident. Accidents happen. None of us were there and we don't know the specifics of the situation, so I really think it's unfair to get mad at her for it. We all know possible things she could have done, and we don't know if she did them and this still happened, or if she didn't and what the reason for that is. It happened. It's sad. But I'm sure she didn't do it on purpose.

God forbid this ever happens to one of us, I hope nobody talks about it the same way.

:clap I was beginning to think I was some sort of freak passenger. Accidents happen and we can try our damndest to reduce the liklihood that they will, but man shit still happens some times! Kids get burned, fall off high places, eat weird crap, and minor things like unroll a whole wad of TP or color all over walls... it only takes a moment.

[Lorah]

Oh I agree that things happen unexpectedly! That's why we call them accidents!

What *I* was saying before, for this incident, that has be baffled, is that the article says the the kid was suppose to be in the car. So I'm still confused how she didn't noticed that he wasn't in the car with her before she started backing up.

I think it would be a totally different topic all together if he wasn't going to be going with her, and ran out to say good bye or something ya know.

But, alas, it doesn't matter now to mull it over, I'm sure she is beside herself with grief! I hope with time all is healed!

[MamaLaura]

I didn't read the article, but did she physically see him get in the car? Or just tell him to get in and then assumed he was there?

[Lorah]

I didn't read the article, but did she physically see him get in the car? Or just tell him to get in and then assumed he was there?

It didn't say.

The article has been updated so it doesn't say the same thing as before... it now says "Police said the mother believed her child was in the car's back seat when the child was actually behind the vehicle."

[ladybish]

I agree that it was a very sad accident. My heart goes out to their family, and pray that we all are as vigilent as possible.

[Lorah]

BTW, for those that didn't read it....the boy is alive... he suffered upper body injuries.

[Kellie_MO5]

things happen unexpectedly! That's why we call them accidents!

What *I* was saying before, for this incident, that has be baffled, is that the article says the the kid was suppose to be in the car. So I'm still confused how she didn't noticed that he wasn't in the car with her before she started backing up.
:yeah
I don't think anyone is saying she did it on purpose, but if your 8 year old is supposed to be in the car WITH you, don't you usually at least glance back and make sure they're there, and buckled? I dunno, When I am going with any on my kids I always get them in and buckled, and then before taking off ASK if each of them are buckled, and listen to each reply (yep, they all take turns saying "Yes!" (or, in Lukes case, since he believes himself a pirate or something, "AYE!") so yeah, that's the part that I don't really get

[Lorah]

:yeah
I don't think anyone is saying she did it on purpose, but if your 8 year old is supposed to be in the car WITH you, don't you usually at least glance back and make sure they're there, and buckled? I dunno, When I am going with any on my kids I always get them in and buckled, and then before taking off ASK if each of them are buckled, and listen to each reply (yep, they all take turns saying "Yes!" (or, in Lukes case, since he believes himself a pirate or something, "AYE!") so yeah, that's the part that I don't really get

Ya that's basically how I do it too. Even with Mav. My parents always did the "everyone here and buckled in?" thing too. So I guess its just foreign to me for someone to not know if their kid is in the car or not.

[Lynette]

I've come close to hitting kids before. Not my own because they're too young, but neighborhood kids, walking and on bikes.

I'm getting frustrated that everyone wants to jump on this lady like she did it on purpose. It's her own child. Come on! It was an accident. Accidents happen. None of us were there and we don't know the specifics of the situation, so I really think it's unfair to get mad at her for it. We all know possible things she could have done, and we don't know if she did them and this still happened, or if she didn't and what the reason for that is. It happened. It's sad. But I'm sure she didn't do it on purpose.

God forbid this ever happens to one of us, I hope nobody talks about it the same way.

:yeah No kidding, huh?

Yeah the whole story sounds weird in general but who the heck knows how it actually played out since we weren't there. If the cops determine she was negligent, throw the book at her then.

I cannot even tell you how many times I have had kids (not mine!) dart out into the street to chase a ball, a dog, come out from in between cars, show off for their friends on their bikes or skateboards, etc so to say you never had to slam on your brakes for some kid is quite a stroke of luck. Shoot, just driving by the high school kids walk into the crosswalk without even looking because they are just too cool to care about getting hit by a car apparently :rolleyes

For us, I had the picket fence installed to keep kids and dogs out othe street. When I back up I have sensors on the bumper.

I hope the kid AND the mom are ok :(

[Lorah]

Shoot, just driving by the high school kids walk into the crosswalk without even looking because they are just too cool to care about getting hit by a car apparently :rolleyes



I hope the kid AND the mom are ok :(

OMG I know...the HS students are so arrogant about it too! :shake We had two girls walk across the street (not near a HS) when not only their crosswalk was red, but the opposite traffic light was GREEN! They think they own everything and has no oneto answer to.

I hope all are oaky too.