Help: I'm really concerned now... [Archive]

becky

11-07-2006, 08:59 AM

My3sonsplus1

11-07-2006, 09:20 AM

okay ladies...all this talk of the best car seat and where to put them really has me worried. Victor doesn't really seem to understand the need for a larger car becuase of safety although he knows we need one eventually. That said, i would love to find out for sure that our car in fact is not capable of holding a 8 year old in the middle (no sholder belt) with a tot on one side and and infant on the other. Any ideas what i should do?

we have a '94 toyota corolla...its an oldie and that also means it doesn have all the cool stuff like tether hooks or latches. Having two kids in the car is fine but i think three is jsut nuts and it just not safe. Victor only can think about how much its going to cost to get a new car but i dont want a brand new one...used is fine too.

Becky literally go to ToysRUs this weekend and pick out a car seat that you think you might want, any seat will do because I am 99% positive that when installed Kayla will literally not have room safe or unsafe to sit, and ask to borrow it to see if it fits in your car, they will hold your license for you as insurance. I know she will be very uncomfortable. It is one thing to squish in that spot on occassion to run an errand or something but to do it regularly, YUCK (and that is in my fils accord which is more roomy than your corolla)! There will be like a 6 inch space for her to sit in. Show Victor the tiny spot that will be available for sitting in.
As far as safety if he is still okay with Kayla being a sardine every time she rides in the car, look up "submarining" as it applies to seatbelts and abdominal injuries child lap belt only, something like that. Lap belts only can do some pretty yucky things to kids, and adults alike really. And Kayla is still a tiny thing she really could still be in a belt positioning booster and those don't work in the lap belt only position.

My opinion/idea at least :)

Administrator

11-07-2006, 09:23 AM

I have a graco infant carrier with a base that you are free to borrow to try that out with. You can use it for a few days if you want

can i also make a side note? Think about this. You have two doors in the back, and two carseats installed... Kayla is going to have to physically climb over one of them to get in - EVERYTIME

lmfike

11-07-2006, 09:33 AM

Luckily for my older two kids dh was on board for getting bigger car. When we moved back up here to N CA in Dec 2002 we had just a ford focus as our only car. When I got pregnant with Julianna I knew it would never work for Jessica being between booster seat and infant/convertible car seat. Funny thing is now we're looking at going down in size to maybe another scion(dh car is a scion)from my grand caravan due to gas mileage and the amount of driving I'll be doing with both kids staying at current school for at least this school year after we move to Cotati(which is still not finallized due to rental verification form needed). Finally got mom to agree to sign it but she won't put the amount in that the bank wants(since we never actually paid money every month just did work/paid for replacement of broken items).

Sara

11-07-2006, 09:53 AM

Well, I hate to admit it, but I like my minivan. If you would have asked me 3 years ago I would have said I would never drive one, but it is so convenient and works perfect for kids. We have an Odyssey on loan from my SIL who is living in Hawaii for 2 years. When they come back I think we are going to try to lease another minivan, especially if we decide to go for baby #3.

Administrator

11-07-2006, 09:57 AM

Jr has forbidden me from getting a minivan so i'm going to go with an SUV with removable 3rd row... *almost* as good but it keeps him happy. :lol

Sara

11-07-2006, 10:07 AM

We almost did that-I love explorers and had 2 prior to getting the van. If my sil hadn't given us hers we would probably still be using the explorer.

daisydoc

11-07-2006, 12:42 PM

becky: I posted on the other forum but like Jackies said I too will have an un-used infant seat with base soon that you can borrow to "show" Voctor what;s it's going to be like. My man is visual... as I think most are. He ahs to SEE what the situation is going to be like in order to understand it. Install the infant seat and Myah's convertible where they are installed correctly and then show him how hard it's going to be for Kayla to get in and out and how unsafe that would be for her. once he sees his first born child being sardined I'm sure he'll come around! :D

becky

11-07-2006, 12:51 PM

i really want an odyssy....and victor is game...if not i told him i want a nissan exterra...i almost traded in my civic for one a few years ago but then decided i didnt want the payments....i wish i traded it in now.

I think tomorrow when Victor is home i'm going to install the infant seat we have to see if kayla even has any room. (thanks for the offer Jackie-i really appreciate it) but my mom just brought mine up the last time she came to visit. I dont know why i never thought about doing htat before.

becky

11-07-2006, 12:53 PM

once he sees his first born child being sardined I'm sure he'll come around! :D
he is so attached to his first born that i think this will make a huge impact on him. that is his baby :) not like the others arent but for some reason he looks out for her more

daisydoc

11-07-2006, 12:57 PM

good luck with that tomorrow then! :thumb

becky

11-07-2006, 12:58 PM

once i have him convinced then there is the issue of how are we going to get another car...another battle YUCK!

My3sonsplus1

11-07-2006, 01:05 PM

once i have him convinced then there is the issue of how are we going to get another car...another battle YUCK!

Well good luck! An oddessey (or sienna) is a mere dream for us, both those things keep pretty good resale value. We have a 2000 quest and like it enough. Does an extrerra have 3rd row seating? Otherwise you may be in the same pinch with no room. I hear the honda element I think it is will seat 3 car seats across if you find finances won't allow a 7 or 8 seater.

becky

11-07-2006, 01:11 PM

i hadn't thought about the element...i will have to look into that...i know victor favors toyota cars and i favor hondas....and exterra is really a dream for us too becuase it will allow us more freedom as the kids get older and isn't as bad as having a van.

meeg124

11-07-2006, 02:11 PM

We have a Toyota Highlander and there is now way that three car seats would fit in the back seat. So, I don't think that an Xterra would fit three either, as they are about the same size.

Megan

Lynette

11-07-2006, 02:25 PM

Packing the back seat with the two car seats is a great idea :D I would also hunt for crash test dummy videos on Youtube.com!

Administrator

11-07-2006, 02:40 PM

hey megan: Does the highlander come with an optional 3rd row? I THOUGHT i'd seen something about that before an di had plans on looking into a highlander for our next car, but if it doesn't even come with the option, then that won't work for us

becky

11-07-2006, 02:42 PM

Jackie: why is your husband so against a van?

meeg124

11-07-2006, 03:03 PM

Jackie - the Highlander does come with a hybrid and 3rd row option now. I haven't seen what they actually look like insdie but I would imagine there would be no cargo space, when the 3rd row is in use. When we need a new car, we will probably get another Highlander, with 3rd row. This is a great SUV and it is actually bigger than the Explorer (according to my brother in law).

Megan

Lynette

11-07-2006, 03:28 PM

Jackie: why is your husband so against a van?

Yeah, my goofy husband actually *wanted* to be the one to drive the van! He tricked it out with tinted windows, running boards, and a spoiler. Yes, my husband is a big dork, that has been established over and over but I think he likes it because it has the stow and go seats, power doors on both sides, and the DVD player. Now he calls my Explorer the family POS. :rolleyes

becky

11-07-2006, 03:32 PM

oh how i wish i was working so we could afford a fancy car like that. You gals are so lucky :)

becky

11-07-2006, 03:35 PM

that is so funny lynette...i can seee it now...i think our only major requirement is that it has to be able to have a surf rack on top

Administrator

11-07-2006, 04:20 PM

becky: b/c he's 29 and thinks he's still a young stud bachelor... and lord forbid he's seen in a shaggin wagon or minivan. He used to love trucks but once i got rid of his and we got 2 suvs he only wants suvs now.
I'm not really one way or another on the minivans. We had one that we borrowed from my moms friend when we were in texas and it was convenient, but i didn't love it... then again, i didn't hate it either.
maybe some day, but i see no point in one for us now, you know?

becky

11-07-2006, 04:25 PM

Victor loves trucks too but is now driving a Corolla...he seems to like not having car payments more

daisydoc

11-07-2006, 04:46 PM

My Acura MDX has a third row but when you sue it as a third row there is almost NO cargo space! WHEN we have baby #3 James wants to either trick out a truck for me (b/c you can put 3 seats across the back of a crew cab) but I would prefer to stick to an SUV with a removeable thrid row... so that sort of limits us to suburbans, navigators, etc... But James is a "Ford man!" :lol I'm just like "I want all seat positions to be LATCH compatible!" ...so we'll see.

I love my MDX though. It's great for me and the two kids... just won't work with three :(

And if JAmes has his way we will NEVER own a minivan! He has the same mindste as JR!! James has always been a trcuk/SUV guy and always will be :)

Lynette

11-07-2006, 06:56 PM

becky: b/c he's 29 and thinks he's still a young stud bachelor... and lord forbid he's seen in a shaggin wagon or minivan. He used to love trucks but once i got rid of his and we got 2 suvs he only wants suvs now.

You could point out the statistics that something like 75% of SUVs are driven by women :D

Brian's friends still tease him about the van, they call it the mother ship because it is big and silver. He used to have a 64 Chevy stepside truck that he had renovated and the a Mustang before the van. I told him when Salina was 16 I will give her my Explorer, I will take his van, and we will get him something sporty again :)

meeg124

11-07-2006, 07:26 PM

If Scott had his way, we would have a mini van. I told him that I would never drive a mini van in a million years! They are convenient and comfortable but I just would never be able to drive one. I love our SUV and I told Scott that if we ever win the lottery, I want a pimped out Escalade or Navigator. :lol I'm always trying to talk Scott into putting flames on my car, but he won't go for it.

We got our windows tinted also (to legal limit) and it makes a huge difference for Caden and glare. It was definitely worth the money and although it's a pain at night, I would definitely do that again too.

Megan

Sara

11-07-2006, 07:31 PM

DH and I are total gearheads so the fact that we have a minivan is funny to most of our friends too. We used to have some great classic cars like my 67 mustang and his Skylark. I guess convenience won over our need for a cool car this time around, but we will see when we have to give it back, maybe we will go for a suv with a 3rd row.

KaisaG

11-08-2006, 07:08 AM

Anna- James should'nt mind a Navigator if he is a Ford man... It's the same body/frame as the Expedition...

daisydoc

11-08-2006, 08:20 AM

Anna- James should'nt mind a Navigator if he is a Ford man... It's the same body/frame as the Expedition...
:woohoo thanks for the bit of info! That'll give me a leg up! ;) The only reason I'm not sold on Ford is that even in their BRAND NEW trucks they do not have LATCH! My parents new GMC has them at every seat position! I don't understand why ford won't get on board the "baby safety train"!

Administrator

11-08-2006, 09:26 AM

anna: do their new explorers? B/c we are considering a larger explorer in february, but it's obviously not 100% set

daisydoc

11-08-2006, 09:41 AM

you know Jackie I don't know about the explorers and LATCH. You might be able to look it up online somehow. Or maybe we should bombard a dealership one day! ;)

I know when we start looking if we have a 3rd that we're taking all the carseats with us to the dealrship and installing them for the test drive so that we kow for sure we have enough room and that they are all installed properly.

Administrator

11-08-2006, 09:55 AM

hahaha, that sounds like an outing. You, me, Sevannah, Brendan and Jazper all go to a dealership and go "try out" all their cars. LOL

daisydoc

11-08-2006, 11:54 AM

LMAO! :biglaugh Can you imagine the sales person? "Umm... you want to install three carseats and take it for a drive?"

alowe

11-08-2006, 12:48 PM

When we looked at the begining of the year that is what we did. We had our minds made up on an Audi wagon then we decided to load Lucca up and go for another test drive. Yeah, didn't work. I had a foot in my back the entire drive and the back of the nice leather seat was covered in dust and dirt.

alowe

11-08-2006, 12:57 PM

Jackie I think when we were researching cars I read that all vehicles after 2002 were required to have the Latch system. I could be wrong I will google it.

I just found this:

USA vehicles manufactured after September 1, 2002, are required to have the LATCH system--Lower Anchors and Tethers for Children. The system standardizes the installation of child restraints and lets you mount the restraints without using the car or truck's seat belt system.
Cars, minivans and light trucks are required to have anchors between the seat cushion and seat back and a top tether anchor in at least two rear seat positions. Fasteners on child safety seats latch on to the anchors.

My3sonsplus1

11-08-2006, 01:09 PM

daisydoc

11-08-2006, 03:24 PM

See that's what I thought too. You might have to really dig to find the anchors Anna but they should be there!
NOPE! My MIL just bought a Brand New ford truck (crewcab... F250 I think) and there are no LATCHs!!! I dug and dug and dug when she bought a britax for herself so she could come get sevannah (which she still hasn't done and she's had that carseat for 3 months now!) but no LATCH. Maybe that's b/c it's not considered a "light truck" by the industry but my parnets GMC that's only a few yrs old and is a crew cab has them at every position! It's irritating! My BIL also has a fairly new Ford F250 crewcab too and they don't have LATCH either :( They have rear anchor tethers but no LATCH.

My3sonsplus1

11-08-2006, 03:47 PM

NOPE! My MIL just bought a Brand New ford truck (crewcab... F250 I think) and there are no LATCHs!!! I dug and dug and dug when she bought a britax for herself so she could come get sevannah (which she still hasn't done and she's had that carseat for 3 months now!) but no LATCH. Maybe that's b/c it's not considered a "light truck" by the industry but my parnets GMC that's only a few yrs old and is a crew cab has them at every position! It's irritating! My BIL also has a fairly new Ford F250 crewcab too and they don't have LATCH either :( They have rear anchor tethers but no LATCH.

do these trucks have second rows or no? I can see the no LATCH thing if the seat is in front of the airbag since technically you aren't supposed to put a car seat there (though you can if you turn off the airbags if that is an option) but some people may not know the airbags have to be off so they don't put LATCH to discourage use?! I dunno, that is weird though.

daisydoc

11-08-2006, 03:53 PM

do these trucks have second rows or no? I can see the no LATCH thing if the seat is in front of the airbag since technically you aren't supposed to put a car seat there (though you can if you turn off the airbags if that is an option) but some people may not know the airbags have to be off so they don't put LATCH to discourage use?! I dunno, that is weird though.
Ya these are crewcabs. so they have four doors and a bench seat across the back which seats 3.... and no LATCH just rear anchor tethers. I think it must b/c they aren't technically considered a "light duty" truck. BUT more and more families use them as their main vehicle so you'd think Ford would want to step up.... but they haven't. That's why I told James that if he wants to get another truck for me so as to fit 3 kids in carseat if we have a third baby that I WILL NOT drive a vehicle of any kind without LATCH! I just refuse! It's a matter of safety for my kids and he, of course, was fine with that. ;)

becky

11-09-2006, 12:13 AM

Well i had a talk with victor last night and he totally knows we need a new car but in all honesty we can't afford one. We can barely get by now so adding a car payment is really not an option unless we does size our home and neighborhood. That totally sucks but i can see where he is coming from.:mecry

Administrator

11-09-2006, 05:24 AM

have you thought about buying a used larger car? Maybve for just a couple thousand dollars?

Lynette

11-09-2006, 07:41 AM

You have to have at least one car that holds all the kids, right? I mean what if there is a doctor's appt or an emergency? You could always apply online at a credit union to see what you qualify for and what the payments would be but you don't have to take them up on it if you don't like it.

Administrator

11-09-2006, 07:55 AM

i'd check out someplace like carmax, they always have really good deals

becky

11-09-2006, 11:56 AM

we are definatley talking about a used car...it has kind of gotten to the point either we move and use victors bonus for the deposit and house expenses or a car...its a tough call becuase we really need to do both.

Administrator

11-09-2006, 12:36 PM

personally, I'd go with the car.
You can "make do" in a small house, but you can't "make do" in a too-small car.

plus a car is a MUCH more short-term expense. IF you buy a house, when will you ever be able to afford the car?

daisydoc

11-09-2006, 01:10 PM

[QUOTE=Jackie]personally, I'd go with the car.
You can "make do" in a small house, but you can't "make do" in a too-small car. [QUOTE]
Exactly! If you have to choose one over the other you have to go with the car for the safety of the kids. I hate having to be a responsible adult sometimes, kwim! ;)

becky

11-09-2006, 04:47 PM

well Victor and I put in the call today and offical said we are not moving...it came down to the fact our lease is up jsut over a month before the baby is up which really only gives us a month. On top of that...running the risk of going into premature labor that early isn't an option so the moving is on hold until she is at least 8 weeks old. On the up side the owners are not raising the rent so that is awesome.

daisydoc

11-09-2006, 05:00 PM

that's cool that they aren't raising your rent! :clap I know you really wanted to move... but it'll happen when it should.... kwim? You have so many other things to focus on right now and take care of. That's just one less thing to think about. So does that mean you're now looking for a car?

becky

11-09-2006, 05:13 PM

Yes but i really have no idea where to begin. Victor gets his bonus at the end of the year so i figure then we will have a better idea what we are up against. My mom suggested talking to the people over at AAA and the credit union first. That is how she bought my car and paid way under what the dealership was asking. In the end...when i wanted to trade in the car for the exterra, my honda's BB value was still higher than what she paid and that was two year later. I would say my momma knows how to shop and landed a great deal.

daisydoc

11-09-2006, 05:20 PM

well good luck with that! It's never really "fun", kwim?

Lynette

11-09-2006, 05:35 PM

We moved when I was 6 weeks shy of Alaina's due date, not fun so hopefuly like Anna said you can relax and focus on you and the baby for awhile first :)

I'm telling ya, try http://www.edmunds.com, TONS of info on the cars themselves (mpg, safety ratings, resell, etc.) and how to not fall for the dealers tricks and what a car is really worth, etc. You can apply on Redwood Credit Union online (for example) and your are under no obligation if you don't like what they have to tell you.

Administrator

11-09-2006, 06:31 PM

Just a little tip that a guy Jr once worked with told us...
you can get your best deal by going in at the end of the month and SPECIFICALLY telling them, that you need to speak to their BEST salesman... say you're going to be a hard sell if need be, but GET that best salesman.
The reason is that if anyone has hit their sales goals for the month it's him. Once car salesman hit their "quota" for the month (at the majority of dealerships atleast... and this "source" is from SR, so i'd guess it applies here) and once they hit that, all other sales are just money in their pocket.. so they won't feel pressured to get you over a certain amount to push them past their quota... they'll take just about anything b/c as long as you buy, they get $$$